WASHINGTON (The Borowitz Report)—In a new poll conducted on Wednesday, a sweeping majority of Americans said they support moving Donald J. Trump to Jerusalem.
The sixty-three per cent of survey respondents who approved relocating Trump to Jerusalem placed few conditions on such a move, other than that it take place “as soon as possible” and that it be “permanent.”
In other poll results, an overwhelming majority of respondents said that they would support relocating Trump to any number of other foreign destinations, including Russia, the Philippines, and “that station where scientists live at the South Pole.”
Though Americans were strongly enthusiastic about moving Trump to Jerusalem, in a rare consensus both Arabs and Israelis vehemently opposed the move.
The majority of Americans are unfamiliar with the historic connections that the two other major religions also have to Jerusalem. I am Jewish and most of my friends and family know the history and why peace, in all fairness, must be a two state solution. When people are ignorant over the other claims and history, it is not a wonder when, like sheep, they go along with Trump.