How to Hold Healthy Grudges

From the NYT by Jolie Kerr

Ed Note: Have you ever (haven’t we all?) felt personally offended by something someone said or did that you reacted negatively to – and then found the resentment hard to let go of? This essay is a clever only partially tongue-in-cheek approach to getting yourself back on track in a healthier state of mind. Somehow the Tamagotchi digital pet craze passed me by – but no grudge here!

Grudges can be good. They are one habit that humans have evolved to keep ourselves from the pain of breakups and also from eating mozzarella sticks for every meal.

Have you ever held a grudge for years? (Unrelated but are you a Scorpio by any chance?) Grudges can be good, actually, and we should hold onto some of them, like petty Tamagotchis in our emotional pocket. We don’t often associate the holding of grudges with virtuous people, but 2019 is a new year, new you.

Sophie Hannah, who wrote “How to Hold a Grudge,” published Jan. 1, loves them. So much so that she holds each of her grudges in a special place, in her “grudge cabinet,” where she visits them and tends to them.

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