Jeff Bezos Sells Washington Post’s Integrity in Latest Amazon Prime Deal

SEATTLE (The Borowitz Report)—Urging Prime customers not to miss out, on Friday Amazon founder Jeff Bezos offered to sell the Washington Post’s integrity as a “once-in-a-lifetime Black Friday Deal.”

Calling the Post’s integrity “a signature feature that made this former newspaper great,” the product page for the item listed it at $4.99 with free shipping.

According to the product page, Amazon customers interested in the Post’s integrity were also interested in the Los Angeles Times’s integrity, which was priced at $3.99.

Customers shopping for Bezos’s spine, soul, and human decency got an “Uh oh, something went wrong” error message, indicating that the products did not exist.

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