If my body was a car, this is the time I would be thinking about trading it in for a newer model. I’ve got bumps and dents and scratches in my finish and my paint job is getting a little dull… But that’s not the worst of it.
My headlights are out of focus , a nd it’s especially hard to see things up close.
My traction is not as graceful as it once was. I slip and slide and skid and bump into things even in the best of weather.
My whitewalls are stained with varicose veins.
It takes me hours to reach my maximum speed. My fuel rate burns inefficiently.
But here’s the worst of it.
Almost every time I sneeze, cough or sputter … Either My Radiator Leaks or My Exhaust Backfires !
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A good pun is its own reword. > > A man’s home is his castle, in a manor of speaking. > > A pessimist’s blood type is always b-negative. > > My wife really likes to make pottery, but to me it’s just kiln time. > > Dijon vu — the same mustard as before. > > Practice safe eating — always use condiments. > > I fired my masseuse today. She rubbed me the wrong way. > > A Freudian slip is when you say one thing but mean your mother. > > Shotgun wedding: A case of wife or death. > > If electricity comes from electrons…does morality come from morons? > > A hangover is the wrath of grapes. > > Corduroy pillows are making headlines. > > Is a book on voyeurism a peeping tome? > > Does the name Pavlov ring a bell? > > A successful diet is the triumph of mind over platter. > > A gossip is someone with a great sense of rumor. > > Without geometry, life is pointless. > > When you dream in color, it’s a pigment of your imagination. > > Reading whilst sunbathing makes you well-red. > > When two egoists meet, it’s an I for an I
SEATTLE — Facing the nation’s first widespread coronavirus outbreak, some of Washington State’s top leaders quietly gathered on a Sunday morning last March for an urgent strategy session.
The virus had been rampaging through a nursing home in the Seattle suburbs. By the time the meeting began, the region had recorded most of the nation’s first 19 deaths. New cases were surfacing by the hour.
As the meeting’s presentation got to the fifth slide, the room grew somber. The numbers showed a variety of potential outcomes, but almost every scenario was a blue line pointing exponentially upward.
“My God, what on earth is going to happen here?” the King County executive, Dow Constantine, said he was thinking as those in the room, increasingly uneasy about meeting in person, left the pastries untouched.
That gathering, three days before the World Health Organization declared a pandemic last March 11, set off a rush to contain the virus that included some of the country’s earliest orders to cancel large events, shutter restaurants and close schools, all in the hope that the dire possibilities in front of them would not come to pass.
One year later, the Seattle area has the lowest death rate of the 20 largest metropolitan regions in the country. If the rest of the United States had kept pace with Seattle, the nation could have avoided more than 300,000 coronavirus deaths.
During a year in which the White House downplayed the virus and other political leaders clashed over how to contain it, Seattle’s success illustrates the value of unified and timely strategies: Although the region’s public health experts and politicians grappled behind the scenes about how to best manage the virus, they came together to present a united front to the public. And the public largely complied.
“We could not afford to have mixed messages,” said Jenny Durkan, Seattle’s mayor.
The restrictions that have been in place off and on for the better part of a year have brought widespread disruption to lives and the economy. But as governors elsewhere have cited the economy as a reason to ease lockdowns, Seattle’s success showed that an alternative pathway was doable: Amid widespread economic turmoil, the state’s unemployment rate has been about average nationally, outperforming some places that have pressed ahead with wider reopenings, including Arizona and Texas.
There are numerous factors that have shaped the trajectory of the pandemic both locally and nationally. In part, public health experts said, Seattle may have benefited from its demographics: a healthy population living in small households and a lot of workers able to do their jobs from home. The city may have also have won more public support for the crackdowns from the shock of experiencing the nation’s first publicized deaths. The high humidity may have helped, scientists say, although the cold weather and gray skies probably did not.
Researchers said Seattle also profited from its network of research and philanthropic organizations focused on global health, politicians willing to listen to them, businesses that emptied their offices early and residents who repeatedly indicated a willingness to upend their lives to save others. Even as the year wore on, and the region’s case numbers were among the lowest in the nation, a survey found that Washington residents were still the most likely to stay home for Thanksgiving.
Coronavirus deaths in the largest U.S. metro areas
METRO AREA
POPULATION
TOTAL DEATHS
DEATHS PER 100,000
New York City area
20 million
58,882
294
Los Angeles
13.2 million
26,559
201
Chicago
9.5 million
16,283
172
Dallas
7.6 million
9,640
126
Houston
7.1 million
7,484
106
Washington, D.C.
6.3 million
6,947
111
Miami
6.2 million
10,659
173
Philadelphia
6.1 million
11,476
188
Atlanta
6 million
7,605
126
Phoenix
4.9 million
10,165
205
Boston
4.9 million
10,728
220
San Francisco
4.7 million
3,188
67
Inland Empire, Calif.
4.7 million
7,139
154
Detroit
4.3 million
8,737
202
Seattle
4 million
2,560
64
Minneapolis-St.Paul
3.7 million
4,121
113
Tampa-St.Petersburg, Fla.
3.2 million
4,115
129
Denver
3 million
3,162
107
St. Louis
2.8 million
4,852
173
Baltimore
2.8 million
3,475
124
Data is as of March 10, 2021. Metro areas are bigger than the city limits of a given place, and often include the surrounding suburbs and exurbs.
The Frye Art Museum is proud to present, in partnership with Aging Wisdom and the University of Washington Memory and Brain Wellness Center, three conversations with national leaders in elder care who have published books in 2020 that bring hope, connection, and joy to adults living with dementia, their care partners, families, friends, and those who provide support.
The featured authors challenge our assumptions about dementia, providing new perspectives and a deeper understanding of care, community, and creativity. Their groundbreaking books also offer practical suggestions on how to implement what they have put into evidence-based practice in support of adults living with dementia, their care partners, and their community.
Each online program will include an interview with the author, readings from their new book, and questions from the audience.
Advance registration is required for each free event:
In a new take on the “garage band,” the University of Washington Chorale has found an unlikely place to practice: Padelford Garage. The practice location was approved by the UW’s Environmental Health and Safety team, which determined the location had sufficient air flow, and laid out a procedure for an eight-person, masked and physically distanced half-hour practice. Despite the sounds of passing cars and some machinery whirring nearby, the sound they can make together — in person — is wonderful.
Just in case you weren’t one of the 17 million people who tuned in to watch Oprah Winfrey interview Meghan and Harry this past Sunday, CBS has made the (obvious, smart) move to rebroadcast the special this Friday, March 12. Last Sunday’s interview garnered the largest primetime audience for any entertainment special this year, which is no surprise, considering the incredible number of bombshells dropped by Meghan and Harry both, along with the happy news that they’re expecting a girl this summer. For those of us who somehow still haven’t seen the special, or for those of us who simply want to re-experience the sweet dopamine rush of Harry calling out his father for not returning his calls, the interview will re-air on CBS this Friday, March 12, at 8 p.m.
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Two cut-paper portraits by Seattle artist Barbara Earl Thomas (l-r): “True North” and “Luba in Paradise,” on view at Seattle Art Museum when it reopens March 5. (Claire Oliver Gallery/Spike Mafford)
No, you’re not having déjà vu: Seattle-area museums are indeed opening up again, following Gov. Jay Inslee’s recent announcement that the Puget Sound region could move into Phase 2 of the “Roadmap to Recovery” plan. (More Washington regions, and thus museums, got the green light last week as well.)
The mood? Cautiously optimistic — emphasis on cautiously. Museums, along with other cultural organizations, got whiplashed last year when, after closing in March, then briefly reopening in September, they had to close again in November. Some, like the Seattle Art Museum, had installed exhibitions (such as Barbara Earl Thomas’ The Geography of Innocence) that had to close before they even officially opened, and many other exhibitions across the region were open for a few days or weeks. Now, those ghost exhibits — having waited in the wings for all this time — will finally get a well-deserved audience, as museums reopen at 25% capacity this month and next.
There is plenty of new fare, too, including a piercing solo show by beloved poet and multidisciplinary artist Anastacia-Reneé at the Frye Art Museum (which reopened last week), a historic Jacob Lawrence exhibit at the Seattle Art Museum (reopening March 5) and a moving show about diaspora and belonging at the Wing Luke (back open March 5). Nothing is certain in this life and certainly not during our COVID-era, so if you feel safe: mask up and take your chance, in case the window — and museum doors — closes again.
With the installation Gahapon, Karon, Ugma (or Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow), Seattle artist Romson Regarde Bustillo honors the art and cultural traditions of his ancestors. (Bellevue Arts Museum)
With the installation Gahapon, Karon, Ugma (or Yesterday, Today, Tomorrow), Seattle artist Romson Regarde Bustillo honors the art and cultural traditions of his ancestors. (Bellevue Arts Museum)
(Also according to Borowitz, a new Qanon theory states that “Allegedly, the former President will hop over the White House fence and begin hiding brightly colored eggs on the South Lawn.”)
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